CBSM on Suicide: Student’s Testimony

After getting tons of feedback from many adults, college students, and teens…here is one of the most impacting stories I received from a student outside of our student ministry. You will love this!

Student testimony I received
“I was raised in the church all my life and was considered a leader among the senior high of my youth group. Up until my senior year, everything seemed like smooth sailing; good grades, active in sports, large body of friends. I was even considering attending Boyce to become a youth pastor. Then my world was rocked by an event I cannot forget. My life has not been the same. One night, which was the last day of Disciple Now of my senior year, I was laying awake in the basement of one of the pastor’s houses late into the night. Caused by no other impetus but Satan’s murderous intentions, I could not stop thinking about leaving the house, hopping the fence, and running out in front of a truck on the nearby highway.

The thoughts were not assiduous, however, they seemed to be recurrent for no particular reason. After my first fall semester at college, I hit a wall of depression and anxiety… needless to say, I was so confused. I once had everything, but now my life fell apart. I could not go to Boyce because of finances, my friends all went away to school, I could not concentrate, remember, or think cognitively anymore. On top of it all, I quit following Jesus; in retrospect I never did truly follow Him. I sought professional counseling and was prescribed medication by my physician. Yet, nothing could assuage Satan’s hold on my heart. I bought his lies. The climax was me taking over 30 combined pills of ambien(sleep medication) and zoloft (antidepressant). My mom found me unconscious on the floor of the bathroom and rushed me to the ER. I was rejuvenated and then taken to a behavioral hospital where I spent 5 days. Even after my discharge from the hospital I continued to run from God. I made a whole hoopla of poor decisions, but everywhere I turned for joy there was inevitably closed doors. After a failed attempt to meet up with a local girl for implied purposes, I fell before God with heart racing and tears streaming. It was 12:01 AM June 6 2009. I could not run anymore. I gave my life to God and bowed before Jesus as Lord and Savior. The Pharisees once thought they had everything… for many years of my life, so did I. By God’s exercise of his sovereignty in the precious overflowing of enduring grace, I have learned that now I have everything. I once tried to take my life in despair, but now I cleave to my Heavenly Father and fix my eyes on King Jesus. He is my worth, my rock, and my hope.

Teens need this message of crazy, radical, divine God love in Jesus Christ. I will be praying for you.

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