Know Your Role: Gender Roles, Relationships, and the Gospel


Every Tuesday morning I go to a high school for a First Priority meeting.  First Priority is kind of like FCA.  It is a Bible study, worship session, time of prayer, etc for students at their high school.  When I walked into the high school this morning, I quickly noticed that today would be a very different day for the students.  Apparently, they coined today as “opposite sex day” as a special dress-up day to conjure up school spirit for their Homecoming week.  So literally, many of the guys in the school were wearing skirts, dresses, high-heels, blouses, jewelry, and even make-up.  To be honest, it was very hard to look at some of them.  Many of the girls were wearing guys clothes, but it just wasn’t as appauling.  I do have to be honest and say that I’m very proud of my students who did not get involved in this little “special occasion.” 

Why is keeping the distinction of the genders and their roles so important?  I believe it CRUCIALLY important for two reasons.  First of all, God says that gender is a reflection of Him.  Both genders were created in God’s image (Gen 1:27).  In fact, when everything was created as “very good,” there was a distinction of gender.  So the distinctinon of gender glorifies God most.  God says that He is the head of His Son Jesus Christ, Christ is the Head of man, and man is the head of woman.  So why did God created gender differently from each other?  It is because He is showing the distinction between Himself, His Son, and even His Spirit (The God-head, three in one).

Secondly, God says that He created man and woman in different genders because that is a reflection of His ultimate purpose.  What is God’s ultimate purpose?  It is the one-flesh union of Christ and the church (Eph 1, Rev 21, etc.).  Genders are to remain distinct from each other because Christ and the church are distinct, but yet they are coming together as a one-flesh union (Gen 2:24, Eph 5:31-32).

The kids were coming in laughing and pointing at each other…having a good time dressed up like the opposite gender.  And to be honest, I laughed a couple of times just because of how absolutely silly they looked.  But haven’t the days changed since “Army Day” or “Career Day” during spirit week?  What is next?  I believe we’ve seen such an embrace and acceptance of homosexuality because of the way that we’ve just chalked it up as silly or even humorous.  But what if that was Satan’s design to get many more to accept it as just a part of our culture?  What if at first we saw it as a gross sin against God, then we laughed about it on TV, and now we just accpet it as a part of life?

During our last Disciple Now Weekend, we devoted the three days to understanding gender roles, relationships, and the gospel.  Some thought that topic was irrelevant for our student ministry.  But I can’t think of anything more appropriate with husbands not loving their wives, wives not respecting their husbands, husbands not leading the family, wives not supporting their husbands, men coming home and just sitting on the couch and watching TV, women valuing their careers more than their homes, couples not wanting children, teenagers falling more into homosexuality, songs about girls kissing girls in our culture, hallmark cards becoming normal for same-sex couples, men not stepping up in the church, and the list goes on.  We had an incredible speaker (Dean Inserra) who taught on biblical gender roles in relationship with the Gospel of Christ.  Dean is one of those rare guys who can flat our communicate the Word of God to any age, but yet he’s such a real guy to get to know one on one.  You’ll have to check out his blog at

We may have lost the present battle when it comes to gender roles, but I don’t think we have to lose the battle for the future.  Youth pastors, parents, and teachers: rise up and teach our teenagers of today that if we want to reflect who God is and what His will is…then we must seek to live as the MEN and WOMEN that God has designed us to be.

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